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TESTIMONY:

I am a 23-years old man from Romania, and this is my story of how I became Christian again. I was born in a Orthodox family and got baptized after being born. Despite that, I wasn’t practicing my faith often, neither my family. We were going to church, but not every Sunday and I can’t say my faith was strong. I didn’t read the Bible as a kid because I didn’t enjoy reading until High school. I first got contact with addiction when I was 12. My mom went to UK to get a job and provide for the family and because of that I stayed alone most of the time during the day and became a porn addict. In the first year of high school, I felt like everything is collapsing in my life just because I was bullied a lot, my school situation was bad, and I was discovered that I watched porn. At the age of 15 I got a girlfriend which increased my confidence and got me out of my dark thoughts and my relationship lasted a year and 4 months. At the age of 18, I went to the hospital 2 times as I had a neck spasm which almost killed me as I couldn’t control turning my neck. After that trauma I felt hopeless, as I had backpain and headaches very often. At the end of the High school, I struggled to pass the end of high school exams because I thought Higher Education is a gate to a better job which is not true in most of the cases. I didn’t know where I wanted to go so, I took a gap year and went to work in a warehouse where my mom was working. I didn’t like it and I used to drink 2 or 3 times/week. The alcohol reminded me of my trauma and in that period, I was very jealous on someone from my country who got helped with almost everything in life. I was stuck in habitual sin and because I was hating my workplace, I tried to end myself thinking that I will never be normal again. I felt ill for one day and that’s it. After the gap year I started a course which didn’t suit me and a year after that I started a work placement. I used to drink a lot of coffee during the placement period making me feel increasingly anxious. Due to the high caffeine intake and the habitual sin that I had I used to have dark thoughts often, suicidal thoughts. I even ordered rope and made the hangman’s tie. My parents found out and knew about my depression. Six months later I made the hangman’s tie, and I was decided to end it all despite passing my driving exam in that month which I waited for years. But I said, “I can’t do it”, so in the next day I met a guy in the shopping centre same age as me sharing his testimony saying he used to drown himself in alcohol and porn after his relationship breakup and inviting me to church. I took the flyer but didn’t go to church as I thought church can’t heal me and, I was very shy to admit that I did a suicide attempt which is very dangerous and is considered as clinical depression and treated in the hospital. I took online therapy sessions afterwards and started reading the Bible. The therapy didn’t help me much, but after a short while of reading the Bible, I felt inner peace which I couldn’t understand but it helped me to relieve my anxiety, quit my addiction and feel freer. After a few months I started opening my soul and talking with my parents more often. I realised I couldn’t have healed without reading the Bible. Initially I didn’t take reading the Bible very seriously, I used to read 2-3 times/week, sometimes even 4. Eight months later I took reading the Bible more seriously and I started reading it almost every day. In addition, I started to use a Bible app to give me more spiritual guidance and help me apply the Bible’s teachings in every day’s life. I still struggle with lust and anxiety but not like before where I used to have lustful thoughts daily and be anxious often, especially about my future as I was worried about my future because I became pessimistic since childhood and thinking about worst case scenarios most of the time. Now I take my worries in prayer and feel more calm afterwards.
TESTIMONY VERIFICATION STATUS: Unverified

TESTIFIER:

Ovidiu-Andrei Cotovanu


PASTOR:


LOCATION:

United Kingdom


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